I wasn't sure if I was going to write about this, but this morning I was compelled to. I wanted to share my story and experience over these past few weeks.
On July 18th my mom passed away from colon cancer. She was 60 years old. "Oh, she's so young", the funeral director said. Yes, she was and my sister and I were also too young to be sitting there making arrangements for the mother who loved us both so dearly. She made it so easy for us. We had talked about what she wanted, plus it gave us something to work on. We needed that distraction. Those lists and tasks were my saving grace.
The memorial service was this past Saturday and as all those people began to stream in, hugging me, telling me how sorry they were for my loss, I couldn't hold back the emotions. It was like a dam was breaking. But, I had to hold it together. I had to be strong or I'd never get through the next 45 minutes. I remember staring at the words "AQUOS" on the television up front. Just concentrating on those stupid letters as everyone spoke about my amazing mother. Then, as quickly as it started, it was over. Again, the hugs and kind words from strangers and friends. The day ended at my sister's house going through piles of old photos with our family. We laughed so much and as I ran upstairs to get more from mom's room, I said out loud "We miss you Mom. This just isn't the same without you!".
I know that things will never be the same, but I'm hoping we can honor my Mom by continuing to laugh and remember all the good times we shared. I get great joy knowing I will see her again. She's in Heaven now, preparing a place for us. She's moving furniture around, planting flowers, watching her favorite old movies and looking down on us with great pride.
I love you Mom!
Jennifer